The Goonch: Vicious Human-Eating Mutant Catfish
The Great Kali is a river that flows along the India-Nepal border. Ordinarily a rather serene location, a mutant, vicious catfish has been terrorizing natives who fear swimming and meeting up with the goonch who eats people (not to be confused with the grinch who ate Christmas).
This creature, a giant catfish, looks like a reject from a horror movie, and is all the more disturbing because it is dangerous and very, very real!
Scientists fear that the fish, originally a bottom feeder scavenger, began eating humans after developing a taste for flesh from feeding on burnt corpses dumped into the river after funerals.
Investigated by English biologist, Jeremy Wade and slated for a television documentary, the goonch is considered an endangered species.
In the past, locals speared them unmercifully in shallow waters and today electricity and dynamite are often utilized. Most anglers destroy the specimens they catch without even eating them.
How big are goonches? The largest one caught weighed in at 161 pounds and was nearly 6 feet long, which is a world record weight and far bigger than any landed before. If one of these critters likes the way you look, it’s goodbye to you!
Is the goonch after revenge?
While that may not be likely, reports of swimmers being dragged underneath the surface by unseen forces are documented and well-known.
(Link)
By MDeeDubroff on 18-05-2009
Comment by COUNT DUCKULA
May 18th, 2009 at 8:11 pm
Our first order of business is lunch. I suggest we start with some lobster Zoidberg… I mean, lobster Newburg… I mean, Doctor Zoidberg.
If I'm not going to catch a fish, I might as well not catch a big fish.
Comment by sharma
May 19th, 2009 at 1:33 pm
horrifying story …. and unbelievable too …
Comment by jorgaone
May 19th, 2009 at 4:11 pm
Freshwater catfish abound around here–as do alligators. Both can grow VERY big and CAN attack humans.
If they are being a danger–set a trap for it. A VERY large hook anchored by a very large wire and a deeply set pole should do the trick. BNothing small could get the bait in their mouth. Patience is the name of the game–re bait as many times as necessary.
I'm sure he eats something besides humans–they are simply easiest to kill, as rogue lions and tigers have discovered.
When you eliminate the main source of food they have always had–they will find a substitute to survive.
Comment by M Dee Dubroff
May 19th, 2009 at 6:57 pm
That makes sense as they began eating flesh after corpses were thrown into the river.
Thanks
Comment by M Dee Dubroff
May 19th, 2009 at 6:57 pm
Thank you all for your comments.
Comment by fuck you cunts
May 20th, 2009 at 2:56 pm
why the fuck is a white shit there in the picture
Comment by fuck you shit
May 20th, 2009 at 2:58 pm
haha everything comes out in stars..
why is the tongue white
Comment by lisa
May 20th, 2009 at 9:00 pm
awhh ! i love fishing but now im scared to…
Comment by bozo_5150
May 26th, 2009 at 10:47 am
why dont they just set a limb line up with like a smaller flathead as bait move up and down the river eventually they will catch it
Comment by BME
May 26th, 2009 at 11:30 am
black is beautiful, tan is grand, but white is the color of the BIG BOSS MAN
Comment by seo san diego
June 1st, 2009 at 5:40 am
scary river monsters
Comment by who cares?
June 13th, 2009 at 3:45 pm
Question: Why can't they just leave it the f**k alone? Like most "monsters", it's another schmuck beastie going about its usual gd business of corpse-eating, scavenging, child-snatching, terrorizing lesser vertebrates, and sucking up mostly dirt. (It can't bite you if you don't stick your hand in its mouth.) But we're a bunch of monkeys. When we're not busy jumping up and down, stuffing our cheek pouches with bananas, and chucking feces at each other, it's time to stomp on the animules. Cut the trees, build a wall, flatten the earth, burn out the deadwood. Make it ours! If it looks funny, kill it. If it's big and impressive (ooh-aah factor), blow a hole in it and hang it on the bulkhead. We're selfish. We're stupid. We have missiles.
Question: Don't we all need the goonch to populate the darker corners of our dreams?
Question: Isn't that Race Bannon?
Comment by sharat
July 6th, 2009 at 6:46 pm
Aah again people do need some thing to get onto the headlines, though they are not politicians or influential personnels to get the work done. Poor these creatures have their habitat changed due to human intervention and have to pay for their life by honked as man eaters…..
Though there might have been some instance, but some1 must find a better way or solution, what can a common man do, if the concerned authorities are not interested into accounts of the needy….. so would ultimately result into time where people would only suggest that this river did had a giant fish….
And would again continue to play with habitat of some another creature till it enlarges and is entitled a man eater, and the history will again repeat itself.
Comment by sharat
July 6th, 2009 at 6:48 pm
So what, after the people did enclave their habitat so what other option were the poor creatures left with !
Comment by sharat
July 6th, 2009 at 6:53 pm
Yeah, you hit the bulls eye man….. Thats what actually must be done, leave them alone.
First interfere into their habitat and then exaggerate the entire scene….
Awful, really awful
Comment by jacob savoie
July 11th, 2009 at 7:19 am
i want to see it.
Comment by sitaliea
September 6th, 2009 at 7:23 pm
realy i understand that we are in there habatate but we wernt really bothering them people are swiming and waiting for there boat to come but they atacked people and we wernt bothering any thing.
Comment by Sitaliea
September 6th, 2009 at 7:27 pm
so curiostiy over came us and people wanted to know what the fuck it was killing these people Keep in mind one of the victoms was liek a 10 year old boy so of corse we wont leave it the fuck a lone when a women lost her child her baby
Comment by bjrc
December 15th, 2009 at 4:27 pm
ya see ya dont get it, they dont know any better. The Goonch is just a big fish that doesnt know any better and is just following its instincts. The Goonch is actually pretty misinterpreted because it is said that it is actually more afraid of you than you are of it. I am pretty sure that it isnt purposely attacking poeple, I mean didnt u see its super little eyes, it says that it goes by its senses like smell, its sensors, and its touch with its wiskers. Ithink that it is just going by smell because it smells human sent when it eats the burnt corpses so when a live humanis in the water it smells the scent and thinks that its another corpse. On the show it even shows the man grabbing one by the tail and all it did was shake and swim off.
Comment by bjrc
December 15th, 2009 at 4:32 pm
dont be, it should be exciting and awesome moment. just have the right gear and nothing will happen. it should make you want to catch one to see how big they really are in person.
Comment by bjrc
December 15th, 2009 at 4:34 pm
that is the most freakin awesome and cool lookin catfish I've ever seen, it makes me want to catch one even more.