Man Almost Loses Penis Humping Steel Bench
Last night in Hong Kong, the police received a disturbing call from a man in trouble.
Xing, a 41 year-old man, was calling from LanTian park in the middle of the night. The lonely and disturbed man had apparently thought it would be fun to have sex with one of the steel sit-up benches around the park.
The bench has numerous small holes in it, which Xing used to attempt to satisfy himself. However, once he became aroused he found that he was stuck and could not get his penis out of the small hole.
He panicked and called the police to help him.
When police arrive they found Xian stuck face down where he had been stuck for some time.
When doctors arrived on the scene they tried to release some of the pressure by removing some of his blood, but the penis was so swollen that they ended up having to cut the entire bench free and take it, with Xian attached, to the hospital.
4 painful hours later, Doctors finally separated Xian from his bench.
Doctors stated that if he had been stuck for even an hour longer, they would have had to remove his penis.
Lets just say this is probably one bad date that Xing will never forget.
You can see a news video on it here.
(link)
lol?
LOLOLOLOL
vraiment ..c ….grave ….lol.
lol just heard about this on radio 1 in the uk, very funny and its not wrong to laugh about it lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol
I’m pretty sure actually I saw Scott Mills doing this to a similer bench in Southampton !!!! This is also a regular accourance in Bognor Regis !!
of course is not wrong!!!, nobady force him to do that, …it was…. an act of free will….LOLOLOLOLOL
Laughing Out Loud = LOL
duh. he wasnt asking what lol was
Actually it should be ROR = Raff out Roud
HE IS SICK LOR…
I’m so glad i subscribed to this blog.
How the hell do you subscribe to this blog? There’s no “subscribe here” option!
It’s called “RSS”.
lol you moron
What a stupid,pathetic idiot!! Now he’s traumatized for life towards “small holes”!!
What a stupid guy~ lol~
Lol, who stupid is that? The social Network Xing.com will be happy to hear
hole-y-shit
Rofl
Sounds like something i might do if i was lonely in the park at night. LOL!!
That would chafe the hell out of my cock!
wwwwwwwwwwwoooooooooooooooooooowwwwww what a dumb a**
Those holes look awful small. Guess it’s true about the Asian “equipment”.
rofl.
not all Asian ‘equipment’ is that small! My fiance is 6′1″ he is small in no way…lol
You don’t have to lie. It’s ok, as long as you love him.
umm.. im 15 yr old and my ‘equipment’ is 5′11″ it’s gonna get bigger XD
No it won’t.
Mine is the same size as it was when I was 15. Passing from centimeters (16 cm) to inches = 6′3” just a little bigger than average… good I guess.
Although your cock doesn’t “own” like you say do not worry I know friends with as small as 4′7” being 19 of age.
why do you measure your friends penises?
)))))
OWNED^^^^
Guys actually mesure their shiz?
yea but he got REALLY stuck meaning that he’s a lot bigger
Hahaha, he must have a psp..
(pretty small penis)
get a fleshlight dude… sheesh
Dude!!!! Just pay the extra money and hire a professional, sheeeeesh!
As a guy who has an asian boyfriend, the asian ‘equipment’ you speak of is really quite nice… this guy just needs a blowup doll or something.
wait.. you’re a GUY with an asian BOYFRIEND? well, it’s either a typo or someone who has a small asshole.
You’re a real detective aren’t ya?
HAHAAHAHAAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHHAAAHAHAHHAHHAHHAHAHHAAHAHAHHAHHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHHAAHAHHAHHAAHHAAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAA
I also am a man who has an Asian boyfriend, named Tim. It might be small but he’s got STAYING POWER!!! I call him DarkChili.
Asia BF? So what’s on the menu tonight, ’sum yung guy cum’? hehe.
Wow . . . XD rofl
thats hilarious
As a girl who has an asian boyfriend, the asian ‘equipment’ you speak of is really quite nice… he’s the best lover I’ve ever had. YUM.
no one wants to hear about your yellow fever !!!
I put my dick in one of those one time and it didn’t touch the sides of the hole.
lol…i love when people make fun of themselves. like reverse thats what she said jokes.
“well, that didnt last very long”
…
“thats what she said : (”
that kinda thing. bravo, anyway
I highly think nobody wanted to hear that, and I don’t even want to know what u r , wyte or wat ever, u would be a stupid mofo to do that… nothin personal…
Video by the local media
http://tv.on.cc/news/news.html?mid=OBK-080807-11571-08M&mtype=Video&mtime=1218057370
It’s funny how they crank up the volume and the news reader shuts up for a moment in order for us to hear the dude moan
This is a safety hazard. Benches should have bigger holes!
haha
All can say is he must have a small willy lol , Just look at the size of them holes , This blog has to be 10 . 10 another LMAO story keep up the good work mr blog master you have made my day ,
Donna x
he went in it soft….you could have got into the hole if you were soft no matter your size..then he got horny and stuck..as would you or anyone…
THAT WHAT YOU CALLED HARD TIMES
Here you’ve been in therapy, you know, thinking you blew it with the greatest girl ever, and really it turns out that getting your d*ck stuck in bench was the best thing that ever happened to you.
In China, metal benches screw you!
Yeah.
and I’m pretty sure he wont even call that bench either.
douche
Wow, Carl, whoever you are, your comment is the greatest.
Genius. Fo real.
You sir are awesome
What?! You’ve never humped a park bench before? They’re GREAT@
Wouldn’t you think that a man from the country that invented the Chinese Finger Trap would have been able to figure out how to release his piece?
makes sense, but never put anything past a chinaman, or apparently in a park bench ,either!!! lolololololololol
Geez, he should of at least used some lube…………… or spit!!!!
you all SURE that’s not a lightweight stretcher that he’s on? and that this isn’t a creative writing project?
hahahahahahhahahahha
his scared of small holes now
lol good he doesnt know this chick i know lolll
1 finger in her max, and its the size of them holes lol
your d*ck must have plenty of room then
Haha..pawned…
What if he’s made the poor bench pregnant? Who would adopt an steel child?
X-Men would
I am wicked Brittish, I have rotten teeth
Everyone is talking about the guy… but what about the bench? Looking all stainless and whatnot… tempting the guy. It’s wrong, just plain wrong. The Government should do something about sultry benches. That’s what I say.
Wrong! It’s ’cause you ain’t got the baby batter on the brain anymore! Jesus, that stuff will f*ck you’re head up! Look, the most honest moment in a man’s life are the few minutes after he’s blown his load - now that is a medical fact. And the reason for it is that you’re no longer trying to get laid, you’re actually… you’re thinking like a girl, and girls love that.
…from ‘there’s something about mary’.
The bench was a slut and deserved all it got.
(Incidently the correct spelling for an English language story is ‘Lam Tin Park’ the incorrect version was provided by the online translation service, worldlingo.com.)
the bench must have been really embarrased
The story is funny enough, but they had to cut the bench and take it with them? Why couldn’t someone cute just get some lube, reach down below the bench, and whack off the poor guy? He’d get his desired relief, his Asian equipment would shrink back down, he’d get up, get dressed, and go home. End of story.
Except he’d probably be back there next Saturday night.
i don’t think it stuck out much.. he’s asian
checkout the first picture. The paramedic on the right seems to be doing just that
I am never sitting on a park bench again.
LOL! Me too. XD
Hey, high_pitch_eric thats nothin i put mine in one to it didnt touch the sides nor did it come out the other side.
Xian should sued the city of hong kong, they should put warning sign, to not put your dick in the bench holes.
HAHAHAHAHAHA! good one
Asians are disgusting freaks.
Yeah. I said it.
I know his name is also known as Jason Mordeno
ROR !!!
Bench looks like a Cheese grater
Typical of a stupid Chinaman. What they didn’t say in the article is that Xian had smeared a dead fish all over the bench and rubbed lip-stick around one of the holes at the top and put a wig on it. Chinese, you have to love them
*Section 9 of the PRCA, don’t hack my computer because I hate China.
Go to hell, you racist jerk. There are stupid people from every race, and you’re probably the dumbest one of yours.
Good grief I just can’t help but laugh ROTFLMAO
poor guy, all he wanted was a companion willing to give love. unfortunately benches dont expand their hole sizes during sex.
Why women are better than park benches: expanding holes.
The Chinaman is not the issue here Dude.
hei, what’s happen?
*lol*
what an idiot, lmao
two delightful quotes;
1) 4 painful hours later, Doctors finally separated Xian from his bench.
“his” - how patronising, lulz
2) The bench has numerous small holes in it, which Xing used to attempt to satisfy himself.
they had to include “small”, theyre not making it easy for him lawl
Yea, but an hour later, he’s just gonna want to do it again.
I’d rather have sex with a cute furry plushie than a park bench. LOL!
i bet you already do, furfag
You sir, are a racist idiot.
Uhhhh, since when did furries become an actual race of people?
They aren’t, their just delusional.
Munchkin you rotten.com fag
is it just me or are his toes in the holes too?
The bench must have a foot fetish.
Probably thought he could get leverage and pull himself out if he could brace his feet somewhere.
ccc MHP
Hey, it’s Johnny Bench!
Oh my god! So much fail!
Hahaha!!! The crazy things some people would do in order to get some release.. I thought I’ve heard of some relatively crazy ones, but this one takes the cake.
Epic fail XD