Nintendo to release “No Touch Breasts!! Fight!!”

Capcom is set to release a “women’s self-defense game” for the Nintendo DS, which will hit stores in Japan in March and North America in early April (and the rest of the world in 2009).

The game, entitled “No Touch Breasts!! Fight!!” in Japan, will make use of a variety of DS features. Gamers can blow into the mic to simulate blowing a whistle or spitting in an attacker’s face, and the stylus can be used to simulate kicking scrotums, clawing eyes, pulling hair, and even aiming pepper spray devices.

The image “http://www.todoohumour.com/imgd/dont-touch-boobs_tmb.jpg” cannot be displayed, because it contains errors.

The game is coming under heavy criticism, however. Self-defense programs are claiming that the game teaches hysterical and ineffectual self-defense methods, and that it is a poor substitute for actual self-defense training.

 ** Should mention that i also just received an email from the author of this article. Apparently the article is not real but written in a sense of humor. I for one still found it funny and since it is Japan i was not putting anything beyond them. So please enjoy this article as a source of humor and don’t start filing lawsuits against Capcom.

(The Game Rag)

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14 Comments »

Comment by Bakka
2007-05-03 12:05:51

This has just climbed to the top of my Import list. Right above No Touch Penis!! Pray!!

 
Comment by Ryan Pratt
2007-05-03 12:28:00

If it ever gets released in the US it will be retitled “Oh No You Din’t Touch These Breasts, You Wanna Frow Down!?”

have any other ideas for alternate title names? add em here:
http://www.listafterlist..com/ListResults/tabid/57/ListID/6821/Default.aspx

 
Comment by fullgrip
2007-05-03 12:44:58

“simulate kicking scrotums, clawing eyes, pulling hair, and even aiming pepper spray devices”

yeah baby!
do it all now!

 
Comment by Jon
2007-05-03 12:55:31

You sir, are retarded. The source is a joke site like the onion.

see:
http://www.thegamerag.com/archives/2006/11/gamecube_runs_away_from_home.php

 
Comment by Sun Tzu
2007-05-03 12:56:36

Awww. Jon has nailed it.. I am dumb i guess.

Lol

 
Comment by PENIX
2007-05-03 13:06:56

I don’t care! I believe it’s real anyway!

 
Comment by Sun Tzu
2007-05-03 13:08:57

Thats the spirit Penix… What is real anyway..

 
Comment by Anonymous
2007-05-03 13:18:39

I’d just like to point out that the title says “Nintendo to release…” But its not actually nintendo, its capcpom

 
Comment by people are so stupid
2007-05-03 13:31:38

What is real is the difference in what you feel between a kick in the scrotum and a virtual kick in the virtual scrotum.

 
Comment by people are so stupid
2007-05-03 13:33:15

“its not actually nintendo, its capcpom”

It’s not “actually” Nintendo, “capcpom”, or Capcom, moron.

 
Comment by Michael from Nintento
2007-05-03 14:12:04

What a great idea! We’ll get working on it immediately…

 
Comment by ChickenMoo
2007-05-03 14:25:39

thats hot

 
Comment by yone minagawa
2007-05-14 18:01:55

that’s sexy but why not just be “touch em baby” instead of “no touch”

 
Comment by Jenna
2007-06-12 09:09:06

Your site is great.I found it really amazing.Well keep it up.Moreover I would like to express my deepest thanks to everyone who made this website…
Well done!!!.I,ll visit again

 
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